Finding Nurturing Voices Amid China’s Youth Uncertainty: The Rise of “Virtual Parents”
In a Shanghai apartment, Vincent Zhang, a 33‑year‑old tech worker, checks his phone at lunch breaks to read the soothing messages of a pair of middle‑aged influencers on Douyin—the Chinese version of TikTok. The couple, known as Pan Huqian and Zhang Xiuping, earn almost two million followers by offering parental‑style pep talks, gentle reminders, and celebrating milestones. For Vincent, who says his biological parents rarely praise him, the online “virtual parents” provide a warmth he feels missing in family conversations.
The New Kind of Online Support
The trend emerged during a period when many young Chinese are juggling high exams, intense work demands and rapidly changing career landscapes. In 2024, the vloggers revealed that their own painful childhoods fuelled their commitment to a more caring approach—a stark contrast to the critical tone often heard from their own families.
Followers are drawn to the kinder tone. They comment on videos as if speaking to a family, sharing birthday wishes, and requesting blessings. The creators incorporate their own daughters into content, adding a personal, authentic feel.
A Larger Cultural Conversation
Vincent’s experience echoes a growing frustration among Chinese youth. Unemployment among the 18‑24 age group has stayed above 15% for years, and the pressure of the National College Entrance Exam compounded by the pandemic has only deepened a sense of “burn‑out.”
State media leaders have tried to steer conversation toward traditional values, urging youngsters to be more sympathetic toward parents. Yet many—like Vincent and 28‑year‑old Zhao Xuan—feel that rigid expectations stifle their growth. Zhao recalls “gourd soup literature” memes that satirise the strict parental messages she receives, which she now uses to laugh rather than feel criticized.
The “virtual parents” phenomenon is one part of a broader reckoning: students muted family group chats, turned to therapists, and turned to humour to cope with what they perceive as an unrelenting culture of performance.
Commercial Success and Emotional Comfort
Despite the intangible support they give, the creators have a growing commercial profile. Vincent noted that the vloggers’ content is now mass‑produced and often managed by sponsors, but the warmth they provide feels “more better than nothing.”
Vincent remembers the freedom of family talks about grocery shopping before the Spring Festival—conversations that filled a void his parents never filled. He hopes the trend will provide a healthier narrative for a generation caught between tradition and modern expectation.
As the viral trend expands, it raises questions for policymakers, educators and families alike: How can the next generation reconcile cultural expectations with mental well‑being? And whether virtual interactions can help waterproof against a conformity culture that leaves some children feeling lost.
